A (not) Hero To Zero

All the way home, while I was driving my car, I couldn't get this one phrase out of my mind.  I didn't know how this phrase slipped inside my mind but it bothered me a lot. So I decided to write it down. "a hero to zero".

Not everyone has what it takes to be a true hero, and perhaps that is why society often labels people heroes who are not really heroes at all.

If a hero means someone who we can look up to based on their value action and if bravery, act of courage and sacrifice are their qualities, then let's go to Spiderman, Hercules and Superman. Are they exist in the real world? I don't think so. That's the masterpiece of Stan Lee, my friend. Well, except Hercules, I mean. He's ancient history.

I, personally, think, heroism is more about collective admiration of particular individual selected by society. But as a person in (my) psychological perspective, people set the figure of hero in the state of human perfection, they apparently have analyzed in mind when deciding upon whom to idolize. That's why I heard people said, "he might be not a hero to you, but he's a hero to me". In some deeper level means that 'your world' is save.

Again, personally I'm a little bit skeptical about the hero concept. As far as I can see, it refers to perfection, daydreaming and personal expectation about a person who is expected to behave in particular way. And since we're living in imperfect world, truth is, just like Ted Leo and The Pharmacist sang, Even heroes have to die. No one lives forever, love. Most of the time, heroes fall. A hero goes to zero.

You see, zero indicated the absence of any or all units. By all means, zero is nothing. Big O. A hero to zero. From something to nothing. From someone to no-one. Ironic. I read many articles about this sudden fall. Worldwide reviews about a football player, soccer team, a priest, etc.

And some of the reviews was personal experience, heartbreak stories of people who devastated enough to feel betrayed by their hero. A departure of family members, an abandonment of lovers and betrayed by friends. All expressed in a depression poems, an angry story and sad quotes. I believe they know that 'their world' isn't save anymore.

...

Once I met this one person, who became a hero to several people. It has been said according to his kindness, good behaviors and attitude. No great achievement or goal, just ordinary people who some people believe has the qualities to be a hero. But for me, I once known him as a man who always been there for me. He was my person, my someone.

He helped me fixing our roof, which I couldn't do it by myself. He promised us a sunshine in a stormy weather, which was impossible but he tried the best way he could ever been. He hugged us when we cried, which felt much better than crying alone. He hold our hands and walked side-by-side with us. He promised to do whatever it takes to be responsible for things that matters to him. He was brave enough to take some risks when it comes to decide what was important in our life. He had sacrifice for us. And most of the time, he was there when the world seemed cruel and unkind, saved us from the loneliness. Somehow we believed that this is the hero in our little world.

Once a reality stroke, a hero slipped away. We had it together so far and there's no more, without telling us what went wrong. Dragged down a picture on the wall, packed a bag and walked away. Left a life and didn't look back. Days gone by, and months after the grieving-part felt. From loving to missing and the hating-part comes next....permanent. I gotta picked up the pieces since the hero gone, back to square with what he left behind. What's the good comes from that? Zero. How to get over a zero when zero already means nothing? Sorry that I had to put a 'F...CK' word in your face, love.

A hero to zero, it's like we losing you... and for us, maybe you never were a hero on the first place. Nothing more. Just zero.

 

Regards,

Kezia Mamoto