Life, please be gentle

I wish you could see my vision in a better view, so you could see things the way I see. Sometimes words in not enough to share it all. Sometimes words can do more than what I meant to from where I began. 

I wish I could share you my thoughts in a better way, but I never expect you to feel the way I feel it. Not my problems. No. I think people has enough problems on their life that they have no-more time for others problems. I don't think they're being selfish, they're being human.

I spend my days walking around, sit on a chair and see people and wonder, what kind of life that these people are living. They were laughing on jokes, not knowing what was behind those jokes. People holding hands one day and the other day they can not look in the eye anymore. It's more complex than what appears in the outside. Nobody understands one to another.

The voices inside my head can not stop talking, these eyes can not stop seeing series of what life could have been on the term of 'what if?', and these ears can not stop sounding different songs that supposed to be a back-sounds of this kind of life I'm living. It's like standing in the middle of the crowd but I was never there. The only thing that seems always be with me is my thought. Maybe that's why it's important to share my thought in the end.

Up until this day I survive living this life. Being able to survive it doesn't mean it was ever ok. I wish, for God's sake, I wish I could understand that this life is worth living. I wish I would know why things still not make sense in the morning after. Life can't be this sucks, can it? A 'delete' button, like in a computer, will not solve, it will mess out the order instead. Crying, swearing, laughing, or even jumping from the 13rd floor will do nothing too. Then, I just wish. Wish that life will not so mean. Not being able to understanding life brings a thousand thought per minute. Then I wish for a peace of mind to rest and sleep off.

God knows what He's doing, right? So I wish....I wish. Life, please be gentle.

never take life seriously, no one gets out alive anyways. -Jonny

Regards,

Kezia Mamoto